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The blood I have spilled...families I have destroyed.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

10:45PM - To all my friends

I haven't posted in a long time, mostly because I am lazy and second of all, I'm lazy xD But this is to all my friends on my friend's list. Complete it and fill your answers out in the comments! Made by Elfinragdoll!

01) Are you currently in a serious relationship?
02) What was your dream growing up?
03) What talent do you wish you had?
04) If I bought you a drink what would it be?
05) Favorite vegetable?
06) What was the last book you read?
07) What zodiac sign are you?
08) Any tattoos and/or piercings? Explain where.
09) Worst habit?
10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
11) What is your favorite sport?
12) Do you have a pessimistic or optimistic attitude?
13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14) Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15) Tell me one weird fact about you.
16) Do you have any pets?
17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
18) What was your first impression of me?
19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
22) What color eyes do you have?
23) Ever been arrested?
24) Bottle or can soda?
25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
27) What's your favorite place to hang out at?
28) Do you believe in ghosts?
29) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30) Do you swear a lot?
31) Biggest pet peeve?
32) In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33) Do you believe/appreciate romance?
34) Favourite and least favourite food?
35) Do you believe in God?
36) Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

Current mood: bored

Monday, November 19, 2007

9:42PM - Ever just wanna punch the wall?

Have you ever felt so useless and moronic that you had the urge to just lock yourself in the room and start breaking things? Have you ever had the urge to stand naked in front of the mirror and just hurt the image you see before you? That's what I feel like today. I feel useless in things, I feel upset. Have you ever felt like you wanted to beat sense into a person because they're convinced that they are wrong but they're not?  But that would make you the bad guy?

It's what I feel tonight because I'm scared for a friend....I won't go into detail tonight..but:

If there is a God, do you think that this is what he felt when he sees mankind destroy each other? Scared because His children are hurting each other, or is he laughing his ass off because we're His little toys?

Current mood: scared

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

2:31AM - I want a mom

I Want A Mom That Will Last Forever (Fullmetal Alchemist)

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

9:19PM - Today.........is


Honestly forgot about doing this xDDD Oopsie! THANKIES ELFI-CHAN FOR REMINDING ME! <333

Current mood: nothin to dooooo

Saturday, September 15, 2007

12:22AM - can't sleep

ugh.......can't really sleep now. Stomach hurts and I've been asleep for two hours and I'm ready to go. T_T Styx is the same way too. Don't know what's going on with us. Wonder if we drive around if it'll help........doubt it. Oh well, gonna go to an Asian District in Seattle. Betcha it's gonna be a lot of fun. Well, I'm gonna watch some anime with Styx, see ya later.

Ja Ne,


Current mood: baa black sheep...something

Thursday, September 13, 2007


YUP! This is just what the title said! It's a sneak attack update! (Mostly cuz I snuck onto Styx's computer hahahahaha! PORN! not really, just loads of anime!) OKIES! Well, I landed in Minniapolis (yet I kept calling it Monsteropolis, hahaha! *dork moment*) and I scarfed down some healthy airport chicken terrioki (don't know how to spell it, I'll fix it later) in like ten minutes with chopsticks. GO ME! and then I ran to my gate. Then I was on a plane going to Seattle and OMFG! I was surrounded by white stuff! Yes, I know they were clouds but it was really really pretty. *romantic music playing* xD

Then I land in Seattle, and Styx and his mother are waiting for me. (AWWW) and I got to ride a subway looking thing. YAY! *excitement* Well, we slept for awhile on Saturday (the day I arrived). Which I didn't get much sleep.......cuz I had Taco Bell tacos and I swear, people spike the meat or something! I don't care what they do, I like the high they give me! SUGAR RUSH! LMAO. So here's a bunch of stuffs we did during the week.

Sunday: Styx and I went to the mall and just goofed off. The prices at the mall were outragous.......oh god, I'm becoming my mother! :P Though seriously, I don't like mall prices but who cares about that now! YAY! So we just goofed off and wasted time, being stupid and having fun.

Monday: Well, Styx got us lost (*cough*) on the way to Kayaking. Well, I say that but really, he just missed the turn off, so we went to the zoo instead. THEY HAVE ACTUALLY SEA ANIMALS HERE! xDDD In Memphis, you've just got green algea covered glass that make ya think that you're looking at the swamp. (btw, I hate the way Memphis treats their animals. Damn pandas! Ever since they got there, the zoo keepers haven't been keeping up with the other animals. You have cows that have no water and no food, then you have pigs with no mud to wallow in. >.< Enough about that though) And they actually have three walruses. They were like HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE! Holy monkey shit they were huge!

Tuesday: It was Styx's birthday so we just hung around and watched Red Dwarf, a rather funny british comedy that I would love to own! xDDD It's hilarious, specially Holly the super computer.....though they changed the actor to an actoress........WTF? xD Anyways, we just kinda rested while Styx clung to the precious minutes before he became a twenty year old. Poor baby wanted to be nineteen. :P gotta love him.

Wednesday: BEST FUCKING DAY OF MY LIFE! Styx, some of his friends, and I went to go see Weird Al at the fair! OMG! It was so much fun! Though.......Styx happened to forget the memory card to the camera (no I'm not letting you forget that, baby. Cuz I'm a bish like that! HAHA!) so no pics for that. *giggles* oh well, I GOT TO SEE WEIRD AL! Damn, I don't care how old Weird Al is.........he's cute. End of discussion! He's cute. Damn, he's married and seeing as he probably has like fangirls flashing him and such, I think I'll just stalk him in the shadows! *NINJA TIME* It was a lot of fun........though Styx spent the day around Livestock cuz of my obsession with animals........not like that though xD We're gonna have two cows. One is gonna be named Mirlk. Yup! It's pronounced just like it's spelled! lol Anyways, all of us were mostly talking about Weird Al, telling dirty jokes and such like that. YAY FOR PERVERTED PEOPLE!
(between you and the whole fucking world, I wouldn't care if Styx watched porn. I'd most likely watch it with him... xDDDDDDD I be grabbing popcorn and making fun of the cheesy ass plot of doom.)

Thrusday: ANOTHER GOOD DAY! Though my shoulder is sore and my legs were itchy from the salt water of hell, we went Kayaking. So much fun. Of course, Styx forgot that damn camera. (Nope, not letting you forget about that either, baby. ;) ) But we got to save a bunch of dead jellyfish. lmao. Well, there was a bunch of little kids running around barefoot! I couldn't just let them get stung.........plus I got to save lifes. GO ME AND STYX!  Though. there was a really young mother that really pissed me off. She had two kids, a boy that looked to be about three years old and a daughter that looked like a year or two years old. The little boy was climbing on the drift wood while the daughter was running towards the street. The mother looked at her friends and said, "I gave up being a parent, this wasn't what I signed up for." Nah shit, bitch. >.<. Styx and I ended up watching the boy until the mother got off her ass to chase the little girl down and then went to go get her son. WTF? That's not parenting. If ya didn't wanna be a parent, don't spread your legs! Though, she probably did have a husband and it wasn't what she thought it would be. I feel sorry for them......oh well.

Another WTF? moment was that I decided to open a dinner conversation in a NICE resturant.......about what I wanted to do with our three kids that we aren't gonna have until I'm ready! O.o; yay! Dork moment for me! Good job, Al. >.<;;; Though Styx was cool about it. Ended up laughing when I said the random, "What the hell am I talking about this for?"

Oops! Gotta run! NEW NARUTO EPPI TO DOWNLOAD! Yayness! Envy lovesh ya all and she'll talk to ya soon!

Ja ne,



Wednesday, August 8, 2007

12:42AM - Chapter Two- "The little shit lied to us!"

Name: Invidia Insana

Rating: NC-17 for the whole story; this chapter is PG-13

Warnings: Drug use, underage drinking, prostitution, suicide, character death, incest and insanity like WOAH!

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.

[info]martelonkimmy WHO TAKES TIME FROM HER BUSY SCHEDULE TO ACTUALLY BETA THIS PITIFUL STORY! *bows to her* You are the best! And because I cannot write details to save my life, I am now teaming up with her to help me with the story! I lovesh you! 

Summary: In this AU, Envy (or Wilhelm* in this story) and Ed are half-brothers and, guess what, they're lovers. While they're out together, Edward is a shooting victim while Wilhelm is forced to watch his brother and lover die in front of his eyes. A few years later, Wilhelm kills himself in Edward's room, trying to keep his promise of killing all the people who helped kill his lover. Roy's a cop who was in charge of both of the Elric's cases. He recieves Wilhelm's journals and reads them, hoping to find Edward's killer and the reason why Wilhelm kills himself.

*There have been rumors that Envy's real name is Wilhelm Elric. I don't know if it's true but I'll be using it in my story.


Chapter One



The little shit lied to us!Collapse )

HOPE YOU ENJOYED! Leave pretty comments! They make me all smilely inside!

Current mood: accomplished

Saturday, July 21, 2007

6:34PM - Bananna Pudding

Okay people! Instead of making this my rant journal, I decided to make this a recipe blog as well! Now, once a week, (probably on Saturday) I'll be posting up a recipe for people to use. You see, I may not look it but I love to cook and I can make some good stuff (It shows on my waistline :P) I'm from the South and we're famous for our BBQ or for our family traditional plates for a reunion! So, I'm gonna share some of my recipes! The first one is Banana Pudding. Now, my family's banana pudding is the kind where you don't need to put it in the oven and it's homemade! It's real simple and really easy. (well, that varies! ;) )

So here it is folks:


Bananna Pudding!Collapse )

Ja Ne,


If you have any questions or compliments, or complaints, email me at
Amensia@gmail.com or IM me on AIM. my S/N is Mentalpalmtree. I also have MSN if you prefer that. MSN: Envy_bloodshed@hotmail.com

Current mood: YUMMY!



As you can tell, I'm pissed off as fucking hell.

Go burn in hell now, you fucking computer!

Ja Ne,



Wednesday, July 18, 2007


Okay, I guess I should have been working on my school work instead of RPing but you know what? That's my addiction and problem, but that's not what I'm bitching about today. I can't find one of my Algebra II slips that I need to pass my course. It's the very first one, so my thinking is, They passed me for the first semester and I had it then, I couldn't pass the semester without it. So, if I don't have it now, would they still pass me? I MEAN WTF? I don't know where it is, I haven't removed it from the envelope and believe me, I may not be the neatest person in the world, but I know when I move stuff! I'm OCD about that!!! I've looked everywhere and I still can't find it! GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! *deep breath* okay, so because of school and my RPing I really don't have time for my story. Though I'm still trying! I swear! I have not forgotten about Insana Invidia! 

OMFG! I had someone follow me today while I was walking home. I couldn't see who it was or what the hell he was doing, but he started talking to me. I didn't get a real good look at his face, but it really scared me. Luckily I was able to keep it cool and say that I don't talk to strangers. He got this weird look when I told him I was coming home from school. My house is gonna be on lockdown for several days! You bet your ass! Apparrently, that if I wear something that makes me look thinner, I'm automatically a prostitute. Okay, peeps, I may have blond hair, big tits and a large ass, BUT COME ON! I don't need you honking at me on the streets! It's disturbing. (Flattering) but disturbing! Now I'm scared to be walking out of my house, in case someone grabs me! It's times like these that I wish I had a penis instead of boobs. T_T

Well, that's the 411 for today, now I'm off to go panic somemore!



P.S.- A person recently Imed me. 'ElfinRagdoll' She's the sweetest thing I've ever met. She's a great person and she actually acknowledges what I say! One of the few people who do! HOLY SHIT! Love her to death.

Love ya chick! ;)

Current mood: OMGWTFBBQ!?!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

2:13AM - *slaps rhino with a wad of cash* I'M RICH, BIYOTCH!

I'M BACK! Holy hell that was an awesome week when Styx came to visit! YUS! and I gotta T.V. for my room! It's so awesome! *dances* I'm so hyper! anyways, Styx came to visit and it was funny because I kept cracking up at night (I swear Taco Bell spikes their tacos with something cuz after we ate there me and Styx kept laughing our asses off for no reason) We had a great week and I grew to love my baby even more! *SQUEALS AND HUGGLES HIM* wouldn't trade him for the world! Anyways, every night before I went to sleep, I had the strange urge to whisper, "TacoTacoTaco." So I did, Styx cracks up and so now I can't even say Taco without cracking up. It's sad cuz when I walk in of Taco Bell I start cracking up. xDDDD Then we went to the mall (supposed to go to the movies but I got us lost on the buses xDD I'm a genius!) and we had a great time. Went to go see the PoTC 3 so that Styx could see it. Was my third time seeing that movie. Then we went to the zoo on Saturday and I got to teach Styx how the Southerners say Capybara. Ya gotta say it like this "Kap-i-bura" xDD Southern baby! haha! So all and all, I had a lot of fun and I am slowly getting back into the Rping swing! Though, it's been said that my Envy is now even more evil and diabolical now........dude! xDD SUWEET!

Ja Ne,


Current mood: TACO!

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

11:00PM - Busybusybusy

Boy am I ever fucking busy? Okay! Seriously, I've gotta clean the house before the love of my life comes over....and I've got like FIFTY MILLION RPS TO DO! T_T And I have yet to work on my fanfiction because of several horrible events that have been happening. (including me cutting my wrists like the stupid person that I am!) Jeez, all this stress and I'm still trying to help as many people as I can.........I fucking hate my life......anyways, I won't be on much this week (not that anyone cares or reads this piece of shit) or the next week. 

Ja Ne,


Current mood: sleepysleepysleepy

Thursday, April 26, 2007

9:35PM - Chapter One- "He's DEAD because of SUICIDE!"

Name: Invidia Insana

Rating: NC-17 for the whole story; this chapter is PG-13

Warnings: Drug use, underage drinking, prostitution, suicide, character death, incest and insanity like WOAH!

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist. The only character that I own is Bitty!


Summary: In this AU, Envy (or Wilhelm* in this story) and Ed are half-brothers and, guess what, they're lovers. While they're out together, Edward is a shooting victim while Wilhelm is forced to watch his brother and lover die in front of his eyes. A few years later, Wilhelm kills himself in Edward's room, trying to keep his promise of killing all the people who helped kill his lover. Roy's a cop who was in charge of both of the Elric's cases. He recieves Wilhelm's journals and reads them, hoping to find Edward's killer and the reason why Wilhelm kills himself.

*There have been rumors that Envy's real name is Wilhelm Elric. I don't know if it's true but I'll be using it in my story.





Now onto Chapter ONE!

Oh, don't be such a baby! It's just the human brain with a bullet hole in it!Collapse )
Hope you enjoy!

Ja Ne,


Current mood: FANFIC! OMG! NO WAY!

8:42PM - Prologue

Name: Invidia Insana

Rating: NC-17 for the whole story; the prologue is PG-13

Warnings: Drug use, underage drinking, prostitution, suicide, character death, incest and insanity like WOAH!

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist. 

Other stuff: MANY MANY THANKS TO MY LOVERLY BETA martelonkimmy

Summary: In this AU, Envy (or Wilhelm* in this story) and Ed are half-brothers and, guess what, they're lovers.  While they're out together, Edward is a shooting victim while Wilhelm is forced to watch his brother and lover die in front of his eyes.  A few years later, Wilhelm kills himself in Edward's room, trying to keep his promise of killing all the people who helped kill his lover.  Roy's a cop who was in charge of both of the Elric's cases.  He recieves Wilhelm's journals and reads them, hoping to find Edward's killer and the reason why Wilhelm kills himself.

*There have been rumors that Envy's real name is Wilhelm Elric. I don't know if it's true but I'll be using it in my story.






Blood splattered against the wall as well as bits of bone and other gore that made Roy's stomach churn. Collapse )


Ja Ne,


Current mood: FANFIC! OMG! NO WAY!

Friday, April 20, 2007

2:28PM - I haven't been on in awhile so here it goes

I am so sick and tired of people always thinking of themselves. I mean, yeah it's normal but when someone's wanting to tell you something, like a problem they're having, SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LISTEN! NOT THAT FUCKING HARD! I do it every single day! I have become an emotional punching bag for people. All I ask in return, is that if I have a problem and if I need to to talk to you. Then shut up and listen! I have a friend who does this (though we worked it out, I'm still pissed about it!). She asked me how I'm doing and all that. I tell her I'm fine then I ask her about her day....then she takes about three minutes typing little bitty sentences that could be told in one message! That freaking annoys me! because then i can't type until I'm sure she's done and by that time I have other people messaging me! But anyways, apparently someone she knows is really sick and I understand that, the only thing that fucking bugs me is that she tells me after I get pissed off when she blows me off. It went something like this:

Me: been having nightmares again.
Her: oh I'm sorry.
Her: I have them all the time.
Her: Though that really sucks.
Me: yeah, if you had to choose between your three kids or your Nii-san, who would it be?
Her: Jeez, you like making things difficult don't you?
me: no that's my dream.
Then she goes on and on about how awesome Nii-san is and how strong he is and that he would kill her for trying to protect him and all that shit. THAT DOESN'T HELP ME! I KNOW THAT NII-SAMA CAN PROTECT HIMSELF! What scares me is that when I choose my kids over him, she suddenly appears in my dream, screaming at me that I could always have more kids but she can't have another Nii-san! And it's worse because I shot him! I'm the one who has the gun in my hands. Fucking scares me! So here's how it went after she realizes that I'm fucking pissed.
Me: yeah, thanks for listening.
Her: oh you're welcome
Me: that was sarcasm.
Her: oh I know, brb
Then she's gone for like thirty minutes. By that time, I'm talking to Nii-sama about it because I'm struggling not to fucking kill her. Then she's all apologetic and shit. Look, if I say forget it, I'll talk to someone else about, FUCKING DROP IT! You'll just piss me off more! then when I do tell her about my nightmares, she goes aww, I'm so sorry and then pays attention only then to tell me why she's all out of it and shit. Great, now I feel great! I feel like shit because her friend is all sick and here I am worrying about a dream! >.<

Though we did work it out but that doesn't mean that I'm still not pissed about it.

My nightmare:
Here's my dream.

Two strong men are holding Nii-sama and my kids (which I do not have yet but I hope that I can have some).
They hand me a gun and tell me to choose who to kill. Nii-sama or my kids.
I chose Nii-sama and shoot him in front of everyone. Then Mira-chan runs up to me, slaps me and starts screaming, "YOU CAN HAVE MORE KIDS! YOU COULD REPLACE THEM! BUT I CAN NEVER HAVE ANOTHER NII-SAMA!"
I start crying and then I shoot myself.
I wake up and find out that I'm back at the mental hospital and there at the end of my bed is the girl who I shared a room with.
She's crying blood and she's clawing at the walls, wailing.
When she sees me, she grins and stalks towards me with her hands outstretched.
She tries to choke me.
I look down and try to get my arms to move but I can't.
When I look back up at her, she changes into a man that I never wanted to see in my life! What he did to me...hope the fucker's in hell.
He points over his shoulder and there's my friend OD-ing all over again. I can't move! I struggle to get to her, to help her!
She stops moving and then I'm able to move.
When I stumble out of the bed, I see my parents standing in the gallows with nooses over their necks.
Then, you guessed it, I have to chose which one I want to live and which one to die. If I can't decide, they both die.
I struggle for help and when I look over at one side of the room, I see my dad's family all glaring at me, telling me to choose my dad.
I look at the other side of the room, it's my mom's family, begging me to chose mom so that we can go home.
Sometimes....I choose dad...sometimes I choose mom.....other times....I'm unable to choose and I see them fall..

That's my nightmare...I have it every night....I'm so tired...

Ja Ne,


Current mood: drained

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

5:31AM - Good morning, the time is now 5:31 A.M.

Someone.......kill me! T_T I can't sleep! so I get on my mom's computer to see if i can watch Rozen maiden from the disks the love of my life gave me......only to find out that her Windows Player is a piece of shit! So I have to wait for her to wake up! >.< I can't sleep..nothing's working....my life's fucked up......I'm gonna play WoW now....maybe I'm excited about the trout fishing trip with my mom...i don't know.

Ja Ne,


Current mood: I wish the rain could fall.

Saturday, March 24, 2007


YES HAHAHAHAH! I FOUND MY WALLET! SIXTY BUCKS WORTH OF MONEY I FOUND! Teehee! Okay, I just had a ZOMG MOMENT......bottled water. xDDDD lol I'm really hyper......cuz I'm high off the allergy medication..... *swoons*  "Come closer, honey that's better!" WOOOT! okay my brain is ultimately asleep.......OMFG!

BOOB OF DEATH! TODAY IS A DAY FOR ANIME! -foamy xDDDDDDD I go sleepy now.....maybe

Ja Ne,


Current mood: Hehe, I'm growing icicles!

4:37PM - You have an air of destiny about you!

...........UGH! Damn allergies! Damn my little brother and his little friend. T_T I'm so bored! I miss talking with my old friends! T_T Life sucks right now.........I'm gonna go emo ina corner.......*emoemoemoemo* Okay I'm unemoing now! YAY! .......I'm still sick...sicksicksicksicksick.........and I wanna RP.........I'm still researching on the Wiccan religion. It looks like it could be the religion for me. Very nice! ^_^ Let's just hope my dad doesn't read this, eh? xD That would be a disaster. Well, I'm done rattling on and on about useless shit. 

Ja Ne,


Current mood: allergies

Friday, March 23, 2007

5:22PM - Damn I started off to a good start

Dammit all! I say I'm going to change and yet I sleep to 4 in the afternoon......GODDAMMIT! WHY AREN'T THE NIGHTMARES LEAVING ME ALONE?!? WHAT THE HELL DID I DO IN MY PAST LIFE?!? Though, I am sick and I can't sleep as well as I'd like....fucking nightmares! Oh well, NiteQyell should take care of that shit....hopefully. I'm so freaking tired........DAMN IT! So this morning I had an interesting conversation with myself. It's really insane.

My conversation with my shoulder angel, my shoulder devil, and me:
SA: You need to get a job. You're wasting your life. *points to my stomach* AND LOOK! YOU LOOK LIKE YOU GAINED FIVE POUNDS!
SD: Oh come off it! She's fine! Plus she didn't gain five pounds. She hasn't been eating all that well. Especially with that obsession over a certain friend.
SA: She needs to let that go and appologize! It was her fault that it started! She should have known that the girl was sarcastic.
SD: Please! The girl always makes us appologize! But this isn't about that girl it's about this lazy sack here *points at me* who's currently falling asleep with her head in the sink..... -_-;
Me: *snorts* I'M NOT! Just got tired of the voices in my head! leave me alone! I'm busy!
SA: Busy failing is what you're doing!
Me: Don't make me tear your wings off like last time!
Me: *glares at SD* I'll rip your horns and tail off!
SD: *holds pitchfork* You don't touch the tail, lady! It's mine!
SA/SD: Damn.........no wonder you're so fucked up...you're meeeeeeeeeeean!
Me: *rubs head* I need Tylenol
SD: She takes Tylenol once a week, how is she a pill popper?
SD: See! Look what you made her do! You made her angry! *pokes pitchfork at Angel*
SA: Actually, it is you who gave her a headache. *holds up harp* BE GONE EVIL BEAST! GO BACK TO THE BOWELS FROM WENCE YOU CAME!
Me: *still half asleep* She came from my butt?
SD/SA: ........................... *looks at each other*
SD: You're right......she needs a job. I'm outta here *poofs away*
SA: *pats my head awkwardly* It'll be okay dear. Just get better and then find a job yes? *poofs away*
Me: *blinks and wanders into the kitchen* Foooooooooooooood! *coughs*

yep.....my conversation........with myself. FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Ja Ne,


Current mood: allergies

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

8:57PM - I'm here for anyone

Life isn't fair and my friend and I are the living proof of it. Yet we continue to act strong and we continue to smile like it'll be okay and it'll work out. It never fucking works out. Not if you don't have people who are willing to help each other. My friend and I are some of the rare few who would drop everything in their life to help someone we've never met. Why? Because we fucking care and we want to help. Then there're assholes who take advantage of our thoughtfulness and our feelings by treating us like dogs because we aren't like other people. Because we don't stick our nose up at the homeless guy on the corner begging for money and we don't laugh at a small child who says something that doesn't really sound right. 

I'm here for anyone who wants to talk. I'm a random stranger who know one knows and possibly no one cares if I got ran over by a truck (unless you know me personally) but I care. Why? I don't know. Maybe I'm sick of people being treated like shit and I'm fucking sick of people not wanting to help. I don't expect much but I do expect you to at least act like you fucking care when I'm upset and I need help. The same goes for my friend. Life's fucking bullshit and everybody knows it. Is that why no one wants to help anyone? Because everyone else's own life is so fucking stupid that they don't care about what the other person feels? I mean, if you make a person cry HAHAHAHA! OMFG LYK THAT IS JUST LYK SOO FUNNY! OMFG!!!!1111!!!!11oneoneone!!! You think it's funny to make a person want to kill themself? What would you do if you found out that they did kill themselves? Would you fucking laugh? Would you shrug your shoulders and say, "Oh well, there goes my fun. Let's go pick on the boy who has no family. hahaah look how bad he dresses! Look how retarded he is!" You think this is funny? Try being on the fucking recieving end! See how you fucking like it! Making someone cry and making someone throw up because they're so fucking worried about you?

Is it how people get their kicks? Now let me say this. I'm not saying everyone in the world is like that. No I'm not. Because I know not everyone is like that, but that's for a different story.

Now that I've said that, let me say this. For those of you who actually take the time to read my journal, I have something for you. I'm here for you to talk to. If you have a problem, I'll be happy to talk to you. I have AIM and MSNger and I'll be here to talk. I'm always online so I'll be here to talk. You can call me: Al, Envy-chan, or Envy. It doesn't matter. I'm here for anyone. Why? Because I'm one of the few who care. I may not have the liscense saying that I can listen for your problems. Hell, you don't even have to tell me your name, where you live, or how old you are. Just talk to me and I'll help. If you want to tell me more about yourself then that's your decision and I'll respect that, but here's all I need you to tell me:
1) What you want me to call you.

2) What you need help with. Hell if you want to use me as to rant at, go ahead. Just tell me why you are so that I know it's not my fault.

That's all I want to know. You don't have to take my advice and if you don't want to, I'm not offended, at least I could help. 

AIM: Mentalpalmtree

Msn: Envy_bloodshed@hotmail.com

Gaia online: Envys~tearz~of~blood

Amensia@gmail.com, Mentalbipolarpalmtree@yahoo.com, and Envy_bloodshed@hotmail.com

I'm here for anyone who wants to talk. Though, I will not tolerate anyone who wants to use me to help them masturbate. >.< I've had that happen before and let me tell you what to do right now: Look up some porn and masturbate to that!

Ja Ne,

Current mood: Will help anyone who wants it.

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